Q: My girlfriend’s vagina is a lot looser than I’d like. Is there anything she can do to tighten it up?
A: What’s your definition of loose? Is it drooping like a wizard’s sleeve? Do you feel like a moped parked in a two-car garage? Or is it just not as snug as you’d like?
The vagina is like a collapsed, expandable tube surrounded by rings of muscles, which contract during orgasm. If those muscles thin out, lose strength or change tone, it’s going to get a bit lippy. What causes the muscles to falter? It’s rarely because of sex with oversized men (unless his penis is so big it’s in the next room making drinks). It’s almost always because of age, childbirth or a pelvic organ prolapse (say, if your bladder drops from it’s normal spot and pushes against the vaginal walls). The bottom line: Thinner, weaker pelvic floor muscles can cause a vajayjay to feel like astretched-out gym sock.
Obviously, if you exercise the pelvic floor muscles that surround your kaslopis they’ll become thicker and stronger. Assuming she agrees with you and wants some tightening, she can start with Kegel exercises and then move to weighted vaginal cones (insert, hold, repeat).
If she’s still too loose, there are medical procedures outside of surgery, like inserting a tampon-shaped probe and sending small electric shocks that cause the muscles to contract, then relax. Still, muscle toning is the way to go. In most cases, they’ll turn boring Vagina Monologues into exciting Genital Dialogues.
Wouldn’t it be fun to see a vagina-tightening product on TV to compete with the male-enhancement ads? I’d call it “The Re-Vagisizer.” Think of the ads! “Shrink your vagina by 41%!” And best of all, imagine Joan Rivers as the spokesperson: “Make your vagina tighter than my face!”